If for no other reason than the use of pluperfect tense.

Because no amount of friends, no girl, no assignments about conjugating the pluperfect or determining the square root of the hypotenuse is gonna help me avoid my fate.

You are welcome to join us on our quizzical quest to find the brightest of sparks, the smartest of alecks, the very pluperfect of pupils in this year's battle to find the champions of School Challenge.