Can I help you, selectman?

Yeah. The selectman sent in this guy Merrill.

A big hand for our most prominent selectman... ...or selectwoman or selectperson, Felicia Alden.

I need to know, why you sold me out to the selectman?

Obviously, I made a mistake, but I've been a good husband for 23 years, a deacon at our church, a model philanthropist, a respected professor at a major university, a town selectman, even.