Well, it was allegorical.

Allegorical, metaphoric, symbolic, spiritual,

Intensely allegorical modern myths.

Allegorical vampires. Which is what it is.

Suck on a massive dong, allegorically

Allegorical vampires, which is what it is.

Allegorical, metaphoric, symbolic, spiritual, emotional, sexual-- Ah, o-okay, okay.

That sounds like vampires to me. Allegorical vampires.

I read the Book of Hosea. It's allegorical.

They probably sit on the floor with wine and cheese, and mispronounce "allegorical" and "didacticism".